Howdy, Welcome to the blog train- My Parenting Mantra. Find on board some awesome bloggers who will drive this train for a month and share their enriching and unique parenting experience.
Thanks to Neha who blogs at SharingOurExperiences for introducing me.
Meet the fellow blogger moms who are a part of this blog train here.
Parenting poses a unique challenge to every parent. While there is no one golden rule that all parents follow, there is however one particular mantra that’s unique to each parent. This mantra that they follow is based on their lifestyle, values, and individual choices. In our case, this mantra is based upon the very fact that we have twins.
I always felt that parenting doesn’t need any rules, until I became a parent myself. I then realized that these rules are not rules so to say, but some promises that each parent makes to oneself in order to give their best.
We felt the need of making such promises to ourselves when we heard the two tiny heartbeats for the very first time. The happiness that ushered in, was immediately marked by anxiety, nervousness and confusion. We knew we would love our kids unconditionally, but our mind was still clouded by some major doubts- how would we manage two kids together? Would we be able to do justice to both? What if we become partial to one? What if we unknowingly neglect one? What if we fall into the trap of comparison? How would we deal with the world who would always compare our twins?
Hence, to be are prepared to deal with all sorts of situations and make our parenting journey easy, we devised our parenting mantra that included the following-
1. Creating a good value system
It’s very important to create an environment that helps kids to imbibe good values naturally. Both me and my husband believe in making our kids know the ‘why’ of things that helps them to value and respect what they have. We always ensure that we create such a system at home that enables them to learn gratitude and encourage them to be humble.
2. Follow what we preach
Kids learn by examples and who could set better examples for them other than the parents! As a family, we believe in modeling the desired behavior. We speak/behave in the way we want our kids to reciprocate and so far this has been working really well for us.
3. Encourage independent thinking
We want our kids to think independently, express themselves well and assert their choices. Since they are twins, the chance for them to be influenced by each others opinion would be high. And so we plan to raise them in such a way that each is capable of taking his/her own decisions. Though young, we still try to ask them about their individual choices, likes and dislikes and ensure that they get what they choose for themselves.
4. Avoid comparison
When there are two kids of same age in a house, the urge to compare is but natural. Each child is unique and so it’s all the more important for us to be conscious of this fact and resist this urge. We realized this fact pretty early and it has only helped to maintain our sanity as a parent of twins.
5. Nourish individuality
My kids have completely opposite personality traits. One is shy and clingy, the other is an independent little explorer. Hence their needs, choices and interests are also very different from each other. So while everyone around tries to find some similarities between them, considering they are twins, we try to understand and respect their individual differences. We even spend some quality time with each child alone just to have that one-on-one connection.
6. Nurture the sibling bond
Both A n A( Aarav and Aarohi) have a wonderful tuning. They have a unique connection that surprises us in many ways. Their giggles and endless cryptophasia (their private language) simply makes our day. And so we do our bit to nurture this connection in whatever way we can to help it remain special.
7. Let kids be kids
They fight, they play, they create mess and do everything that irritates us. But at the end, we as parents try to be mindful about the fact that they are kids and will act their age. We try to be conscious while placing our expectations on them and allow them to learn their way.
My husband and me keep reminding each other of these promises and in all situations we try to follow them. This not just helps us to enjoy as a family but also makes our parenting journey less complicated.
Enjoyed reading My Parenting Mantra? See what our next blogger mom Priyadarshani who blogs at Rattlebabblebattle says about her Parenting Mantra. Also, don’t forget to leave a comment here and share your opinions. We are all ears.
Also read: Do Not Sacrifice For Your Kids: Simply Live and Let Live
This Post Has 32 Comments
Not comparing them, respecting their individuality is very important. It was good to read your parenting mantras. Inspiring post..
Thank you ☺️
Nurturing the sibling bond is very important. Thanks for hopping on the blog train. Good read indeed!
Thank you. The pleasure was all mine.
loved your parenting mantra …comparision if avoided can help in raising a confident kid and Loved the way you have explained the sibling bond and individuality …
Thanks a lot.
This is a lovely post and yes avoiding comparison is the key to a healthy relation between the twins and nurturing their special bond!
Thank you ☺️
great post… all these aspects are really important to enrich the parenting experience
Lovely post Charu.. not having comparisons has been must difficult for us seriously
Yes, ensuring this is the toughest.
Loved that you emphasise on building sibling live and never compare. It’s so important while raising two kids. Excellent write up!
Yes. Thank you.
Loved the way you are bringing up your kids. It is indeed very difficult to create a balance between two kids. Your thoughts are extremely balanced and practical. You are indeed doing a good job as a parent.
Loved reading your parenting mantras ? and the fears you have pointed out are so real. I so agree with you on all.
It’s essential to not compare and let each child bloom in its own way
Yes, comparison brings inferiority complex. I must say I relate and follow what you mentioned in the post.
Inspiring post.I loved your mantra.
Yes one kid should not be compared with other one.
Lovely blog! Parenting is really a lot of promises,isn’t it? ?
Loved your post.. My favorite point is “Follow what we preach”. Kids do what their parents so it’s a bigger responsibility to be a good role model for kids.
Lovely post, all that you said is very sound. I specially agree with Follow what you preach as kids do learn by observation. Do not compare as yes each child is unique, we need to nurture that uniqueness. And nurture the sibling bond, It is the best friend for life that a child has in his sibling.
Completely agree with all your mantras.. especially avoid comparison and nourish individuality. I can imagine this is even more important with twins where there is a natural tendency to compare he two children
Your fears are so valid. After having a baby I can truly say it is must be a tough job to bring up twins. Without meaning to one is constantly comparing whether we are doing things equally for both. ANother one of those mom guilts i suppose.
You have covered very important points of our parenting, I also comparing them is insult to ourselves, as we teach what we preach
Loved reading this.. it’s really important to emphasise on building sibling love and not to compare two kids..
When you have two kids this becomes the most important thing.
I can understand.. It must be very difficult raising 2 kids… Great way and parenting mantras for upbringing
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How true this is.. parenting is all about doing what we expect & preach. Love how you brushed the topic of independent thinking it will surely help them in long run. Lovely post.
Wonderful posts Charu. I strongly feel parenting is not just about enforcing kids with our thoughts and our ways.. But it’s about nurturing them keeping their individuality intact and letting them bloom
Not comparing the is the best thing to do. Loved your write up
Promises of parenting looks more promising. Really it gives a deep understanding about your parenting style. Happy to join with you on this blog train!!!
Love your writeup. Completely agree with your all mantras. Beautiful pictures.